Eyeballs. Karma. Eyeballs. Karma.
I think about eyeballs a lot…eyeballs and sight and karma. I’ve got someone else’s cornea in my left eye. Thinking too deeply about this fact gives me the willies. But with this other person’s cornea, my vision was improved from being effectively useless to being more or less normal when wearing glasses.
One day I will probably need to get another cornea replacement in my right eye, and—because I was relatively young when I got my first cornea transplant—I’ll probably need to replace the replacement. Thinking too deeply about this fact gives me the willies.
Sometimes, when I’m really stressed about something—usually at work—really wigging out—my eye hurts a little. My instinct is to rub it, but I know that is a no-no—so I pause a moment and try to remember that I have someone else’s cornea in my left eye. That I’m seeing, in a fairly literal sense, out of someone else’s eye (or at least a part of it). This gives me the willies. This provides a shocking frame of reference too.
I hold you dear
I have not
thought you up
This is all a roundabout way of settling and seeking context. Slowing down. A sort of thank you.